February 21, 2004

best friends

During a play date today, Damian's buddy D declared that Damian wasn't his best friend anymore.

Damian, who I don't think had ever entertained the notion that they were in fact best friends, was hurt by this. He said he wanted to be best friends still and why wouldn't D and that was mean and so on in that vein.

D decided that they could be best friends after all, but only on Sundays. Not the rest of the week. He was adamant.

Also Fridays, Damian said.

Okay, Fridays too, said D. And Saturdays.

They agreed that Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays were best friend days but the rest of the week? Not even friends.

Damian now has three best friends. T is his best friend at the morning school, C is his bud at the afternoon school, and D, who doesn't go to school with him, is the weekend designate.

I worry: is he spreading himself too thin? Will it be like this when he's ready to date? Does he know what he's getting himself into? And what does he do at his birthday party when all the best friends converge? Preschool social configurations can be brutal.

Maybe we should have a contract drawn up, like the kind they do in divorce settlements. Splitting Damian's best friend quota between the three boys, with special dispensation for occasional pre-agreed play dates after school hours. Know any good lawyers for the kindergarten set? They'd have to take play doh and toy cars in payment.

Posted by Tamar at February 21, 2004 10:29 PM